Category Archives: Uncategorized

A New Home.

As some of you might remember, this blog used to be titled “17th and Sanchez.”  It was blog about my life–how I ended up living near the corner of 17th Street and Sanchez Street in San Francisco.  I loved that old place.  I’ve moved!

This is where I lived for my first 6 years in San Francisco

I have so many incredible memories from 17th and Sanchez.  (By the way, I lived on the middle floor, front unit, house with the orange garage.)  However, it was time to move.  It was time to get a roommate and move into a nicer and roomier place.  And, on top of that I found a place that is even gayer than my old place.  I moved into a 2 bedroom apartment that is basically at the corner of 18th and Castro.  For those of you have been to the Castro, you know that I now live at the heart of the gay mecca.  Quite literally.  I’m living at the crossroads of Gay and Gayer.  And I love it.  Of course, I only had to move 2 blocks to get to where I currently live, but somehow I feel as though it was a significant move.

So, with a new address comes a new blog.  I won’t be changing the URL address of the blog.  It will continue to be http://www.tyflyguy.com.  But, you will see numerous other changes–probably less flight attendant stories and more gay community stuff.  Of course, I will continue to draw from my conservative Christian past.  And you can be sure that I will sprinkle it with stories about my new gay roommate J. (We’re just roommates, not lovahs)  Oh yes, and I shouldn’t forget J’s pussy Leo.  I already have developed a strong relationship with J’s pussy.  Now before you get your panties all wadded up, I’m talking about my roommate’s cat.  His name is Leo.

So welcome back to my blog.  Let’s call it tyflyguy: 18th and Castro, at the corner of Gay and Gayer.

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Porn and my 88-year-old Grandmother

I’ve been going through a tough time since the break-up.  But, I’m getting better.  Frankly, I just haven’t felt like writing or being creative.  I’ve been drinking too much and watching too much TV, not to mention watching too much porn.  I’ve been very lazy.  Over the last several weeks, however, I feel like I finally have turned the corner and am on a new and much improved street.

But let’s get back to what I’m sure caught your attention in the first paragraph.  Porn.  Now, I realize that I have a rather diverse, yet small, group of readers.  And I’m sure that all of you have strong feelings about this topic.  Some of you may be “disgusted” by it.  Some of you may be “confused” by it.  Some of you may have numerous online subscriptions to various porn websites.  Whatever.  There is room in this world for all of you.  And I’m not here to discuss the benefits or detriments of porn.  So please don’t turn my blog’s comment section into a porn discussion board.  Different strokes for different folks.  eh hm.

Anyway, in the interest of full disclosure, here’s my perspective.  After all, it is my blog.  I like porn, I like nudity, I like sex.  I always have.  And I treat it like I try to treat anything else in my life:  Moderation in all things.

Here’s a little history of me and porn.  It all started in 1985 when I was in 5th grade.  A friend of mine named Bret invited me to his house to show off his stash.  Evidently he had been slowly stealing Hustler magazines from his dad’s collection.  As I entered his bedroom that special day, I had no idea what awaited me.  But, I was lucky, Bret was already a porn “pro” and was able to explain to me what all the parts were and what they did.  Honestly, 24 years later, I still haven’t thanked Bret for what would be my initial lesson in sex education.  My parents were not what I would call communicative. We did not discuss problems or even really have any kind of discussions at all. Especially when it came to sex.  So I was clearly on my own.  Until Bret stepped up to the plate.  Thanks, Bret, I owe you one.

Without getting too graphic, let’s just say I learned on that very special afternoon a lot about human anatomy.  Honestly, I don’t remember much about the woman in the picture.  But I can still describe to you in full detail the man (including his feathered, bleach blond hair and 80s porn ‘stache).  It was enough to fully pique my interest.  And from that moment on, I was incredibly curious about men’s anatomy.  My imagination went wild.  Which is why I loved my new best friend…the JC Penney Catalog.  You see, the JC Penny catalog had like a 5 or 6 page spread of men in their underwear.  It was like the holy grail of soft porn.  And when my Grandma would receive her quarterly catalog, I was in underwear heaven.  It was like being allowed to visit a guy’s locker room–without the teasing and shame and threats of swirlies.

I think this model (on left) is actually Ashton Kutcher's dad...

Well, my history with porn strangely came full circle this past summer when I was home visiting my grandma.  While sitting next to my grandmother showing her pictures that I had taken at the Iowa State Fair, I inadvertently entered into a very special and very private section of pictures in iPhoto.  Shit.  Yes, that’s right.  I accidentally showed my 88-year-old grandmother gay porn. Full on, hard penis, legs spread, gay porn.  And this was G-ma’s response to seeing some random dude in all his glory: “Ohhhhhhh.”  Immediately my fingers fumbled across the keyboard, in an effort to close iPhoto, only to forward through several more naked photos. Finally, flustered and unable to stop the peep show, I just slammed the laptop shut. I took a deep breath, feeling my face burning red, and slowly slid away from G-ma.  After several minutes of painful and complete silence I simply said, “I’m kind of tired, Grandma, I think I’ll go to bed.” And that was that.

My family has mastered the art of not talking about things, at least directly.  So I called my sister the next day and told her.  It’s just how we communicate.  I’m fairly confident Grandma and I will never talk about it.  Just like we never talked about why the men’s underwear section of her JC Penney’s Catalog was always missing or left tattered.

A Summer in Review

What a summer.  I mean really.  It started with the break-up in May.  June was filled with lots and lots of work and one kick-ass gay pride celebration.  Pride weekend was sort of like my official re-entrance into the social world.  I was able to hang out with lots of friends, reconnecting to many people who I just lost contact with along the way.  Saturday night of Pride weekend I had a spontaneous cocktail party.  It was so much fun.  I just played bartender and enjoyed having my apartment full of drunk flight attendants.  (not unlike many layovers throughout the years…)

Flight Attendant Pride Party

Flight Attendant Pride Party

In July I decided to take a vacation by myself.  I haven’t been on many true “vacations.”  And this needed to be a true getaway for me.  After basically working myself into the ground in June, I needed to take it easy.  So… New York.  I’ve been to New York a bunch of times, but I’ve never gone by myself.  I liked the sound of it. It seemed like the right thing to do as a single guy.  I didn’t want to go to a place that I knew lots of people, because the trip would be about seeing everyone.  I wanted to completely operate on my own whims and schedule.  And I did!  I found a great little Midtown hotel online called the Pod Hotel.  I flew out for free on Virgin America. (my airline has a reciprocal agreement with them) The trip was absolutely perfect.  I geeked-out at several museums.  I went to one very powerfully emotional musical.  I roamed Manhattan.  I had lots of sex.  Like I said, the trip was perfect.  I even started to joke about the trip by calling it my sex-cation.  😉

On that note, I have to admit that I was actually surprised by how uptight New Yorkers were about sex.  Maybe it has something to do with living in a city that embraces sexuality in so many ways.  I thought I would take a very direct approach, this was NYC after all.  They invented the art of getting to the point.  However, it seemed to scare off a lot of guys.  The internet has created a very sterile approach to sexuality.  People try to weed out every guy that isn’t perfect in every way.  But, perfection doesn’t truly exist.  So, most guys just play around online.  They chat.  They cam.  They spend a lot of time alone with their hand.  Maybe I should write a whole post just about these issues.  I’m a-gonna.  For now, I’ll move one.  Regardless, here’s a couple pictures from New York.

at MoMA, in the "mark your height" room.

at MoMA, in the "mark your height" room.

on Broadway!  I was just trying to give a Broadway pose.  I just look crazed.  It was fun trying to get this shot...

on Broadway! I was just trying to give a "Broadway" pose. I just look crazed. It was fun trying to get this shot...

having a drink with old friends and meeting new ones

having a drink with old friends and meeting new ones

In August I went home to Iowa to visit my family.  Since I haven’t been home since February of 2008, and I am trying to get back to Iowa more often, this trip was essential.  I went for seven whole days and had an incredible time.  My friend Phoenix joined me for a few of those days.  We spent the weekend in Des Moines at the Iowa State Fair and went to Des Moines’ gay bars.  The gay bars were disappointing, but the Iowa State Fair absolutely lived up to it’s reputation.  I’m not just biased, having grown up on the ISF.  It really is truly amazing.  Great food.  Great entertainment.  Great eye candy, which is why Phoenix joined me. 😉  If you are a size queen, it’s one of the country’s largest fairs.  Just Google it to see why everyone needs to visit it before they die.

Also, while I was in Iowa, my grandmother had her 88th birthday party.  But the real surprise for me was the night I spent at the 2009 Sprint Car Nationals.  Um, yeah, you heard me correctly.  It went against everything that I believe in, and I had an truly incredible time.  Sometimes you just have to say, “Fuck it. I’m gonna relax and have fun.”  It was awesome.  I’m not sure I’ll ever go again, but I’m glad I went this time.  Overall the trip was great.  I spent a lot of time with my grandma, and I finally met my youngest nephew Cash.

Phoenix and I, posing with the Iowa State Fair Ribbons.

Phoenix and I, posing with the Iowa State Fair Ribbons.

Here I am posing with a sprint car.  Don't you think I fit right in?

Here I am posing with a sprint car. Don't you think I fit right in?

That just about sums up my summer.  Be sure to check out all my photos on flickr.  So far, I just have the NY ones loaded.  The Iowa ones will be up soon.

Shit, Fuck, Asshole, and Other Various Stress Relievers

Shit, Fuck, Asshole, and Other Various Stress Relievers.  That was my first attempt at titling this post.  I immediately rethought my choice of words.  Not because I have a problem with putting swear words in the title of a post, hell no. It just seemed a little, eh-hem, how to do I put it nicely…well, gay sexual.  Obviously, I don’t have a problem with gay sex.  But, I didn’t want to mislead readers into thinking that I was writing about how sex can relieve stress.  I’ll save that for later.

I’m once again writing about swearing.  I found a very interesting article online.  It discusses the reasoning behind our swearing.  Check it out.  In case you don’t care to read it, let me break it down for you:  Swearing helps relieve pain and stress; the benefits decrease if you do it too much.  There you have it.  FUCK!

I sure do feel better.

I should perhaps refer you to one of my earlier posts on swearing entitled, @$%#! It’s one of my all-time favorite posts.  And, it gives you a little history of me and swearing.  SHIT! Sorry, I was feeling a little tense all of a sudden.

I think that swearing is one of the biggest guilty pleasures of most Christians.  Many won’t admit to it.  But, it is an amazing stress reliever.  When I was in Bible College, my friends and I would throw out a “shit” or a “bitch,” possibly an “asshole” every now and then.  You know, behind closed doors.  It was a guaranteed laugh.  There was something just wonderfully inappropriate about it.  Oh yeah, another great stress reliever that many Christians will not admit to enjoying is porn, soft and hardcore.  But that really should be saved for another post.  🙂  I can’t wait to see if anyone is brave enough to admit to that one in my comment section.  And not in a “I used to struggle with porn” sort of way, but a “yeah, I like porn” sort of way.  I doubt it.

Now that I’ve officially offended, pissed off, or lost half of my readers, I can safely say this, “Congratulations, fuckers, you made to the end of my post.”  Don’t hold in that nice and juicy expletive that has been building up for days.  Get creative with it.  It very well may be the remedy for what ails you.  SHITFUCK, ASSHAT, BITCHY BITCHERSON!

And, no, thank you very much, I do not have Tourette’s.

p.s. I decided to leave the title as is. It just gave me too much joy.  Which, in turn, is another great stress reliever.

Welcome to my new home!

under-construction1

17th and Sanchez has moved!

Well, folks, after much consideration I have decided to move my blog to WordPress.com.  I’ve been using Google’s Blogger for the last two years, but I’ve become really bored with it.  I want and need a new look/feel for my blog.  This change most likely won’t affect most of you that greatly.  For those of you who read my blog through Google Reader or RSS, you may need to change my blog address to http://www.tyflyguy.com.  For some of you this may not be necessary as I have redirected http://www.17thandSanchez.com to my new WordPress address.  So just type in the same old addy.

Along with the location changes, I’m also toying with changing my blog’s name to simply tyflyguy.  It’s become my online persona and I find it fitting.  We’ll see.

I’m really excited about these changes.  However, for the next several days my blog is going to be a big mess while I get it all set up.  Please just bear with me as I try to take it to the next level.  much love…

A Serious Problem

There is a serious problem that is sweeping across the nation: People are talking on their cell phones while on the toilet in public bathrooms. It’s an epidemic. I know that with this blog I am moving into the world of ranting. But, I raved last week, so I have to even things out. I don’t want to seem too positive.

So, I have given in to the fact that people are always on their cell phones. And, in all sorts of inappropriate places. Not too long ago, I listened to a girl on the bus break up with someone on her cell phone. On the AirBart bus, I consistently have to listen to business people taking care of business on their cell phones. I live on a busy street and can hear everything that happens on the sidewalk in front of my place. One night at about 2 am, I was awakened to a guy telling someone about all the things that he could do…sexually.

I can handle all of those things. It’s an intrusion; but, I’ve just decided to put on my big girl panties and deal with it. But, I have to draw the line. It’s one thing if someone wants to talk on the phone at home while sitting on the toilet, but, if there is any place where a person should be able to have a moment of privacy–it is while they are going to the bathroom.

Here is part of a conversation I overheard not too long ago while in the bathroom:
(Please pardon the sound effects, I think it gets my point across.)

“Hey, Honey…” (ppffffffttt)
“No I’m not busy…” (ppffffffttt)
“Oh, baby that’s great!” (ppfffffffttt)
“Oh, that’s just cars going by…” (ppffffffttt)
“No, No…you’re not interrupting…” (rrrrrgggggpppffffftt)
“Okay, bye, love you.” (flush)

I have just one thing to say to those who choose to use their phones at the most inopportune times: VOICEMAIL.

God, I feel much better now.

My Latest Addiction

Ok, so I am totally in love with my DVR. What an amazing invention. TV–whatever, whenever, however you want it. Commercial free, basically. This device was created specifically for the obsessive type of person, like me.

I seriously have no idea how I survived for years without one. Its not that I even used to tape my shows on a VHS tape, and this is making my life better by not have to use a tape–no–I seemed to have discovered lots of shows that I can’t live without. Shows that I never would have found the time to watch before, I can now squeeze into my schedule at 3 am.

And, in my true obsessive nature I can’t just let the DVR fill up and have all these shows to watch at random when I get bored. I have to watch them as soon as I see that they’re on there. 9 hours of Top Design marathon just taped. Oh my God, I have to watch it now. Why? Because I can. And also, so that I can clear the DVR screen. See, I told you, I ‘m obsessive. It really is about checking things off a list. Which is like my favorite thing to do in the world. Nothing gives me more joy than checking/erasing something off of a list.

The DVR is basically one big “to do” list. And now I only have to spend $10 a month to check things of its list. I told you it is like the best invention ever, next to antibiotics or something…