Category Archives: Video

Gays on Parade

Posted on August 19, 2008 | Leave a comment

An article in the San Francisco Chronicle this morning was titled: Gawking Tourists Not Welcome in the Castro. I laughed out loud. I guess the days of priding ourselves on our differences are gone.

I do know exactly what the article was talking about, however. For months now, double-decker tourist buses have been driving through the heart of the Castro. And recently, they are actually letting the tourists out. There goes the neighborhood. I will admit it always makes me giggle a little when I’m dragging my laundry to the laundry mat or walking to the store and the bus roles by at about 10 miles an hour. I’m curious just how many pictures I’m in. I’d love to read the caption in their scrapbook. It might possibly read:

Here’s Henry and me… amongst the homosexuals.

-or-

Here’s a picture of one dragging his laundry along like a homeless person.

-or-

…and the homosexuals go grocery shopping, too!

I can almost picture Margaret and Henry sitting in a doily-filled living room showing off their scrapbook to friends.

According to the article, the real problem is that the tour bus companies have recently changed their route to allow for a 20-minute stop in the Castro. People are getting off the bus and moving about the Castro in groups of 30 or so intensely-afraid tourists. I have seen them. But, I think it’s great. If we want people to view the GLBT community as humans, real people, they need to see that we are just like everyone else. Right? Of course, not all communities have men dressed up as flamboyant nuns or hunky men dressed up as Jesus on Easter.

I’m just surprised that there is an uproar at all. After all, tourism is–ok, I’m sorry… side note here. As I was typing this at my café, a double-decker tour bus just rolled by full of gray-haired folks–anyway, tourism is San Francisco’s life blood. It has kept many of our businesses afloat.

I guess these days gays are trying so hard to be considered normal that they don’t want people to see their differences. With the vote on the same-sex marriage ban looming, many are afraid that if people think all we do is just run around in the nude having sex behind bushes, they won’t want to support our relationships. But, I think that if we have to sacrifice our culture, which is sexual, but actually much more, what have we gained? So, in that vein–gays on parade–I decided to share some of the footage I shot from this year’s San Francisco GLBT Pride Parade:

Estelle Getty

Posted on August 3, 2008 | 1 comment

I’m a little ashamed, frankly, that it’s taken me over a week to make note of Estelle Getty’s passing. She is known best for her Golden Girls’ role as Sophia–the quick-witted, sassy mother of Bea Arthur’s character Dorothy. Estelle passed away three days shy of her 85th birthday, after a long battle with Lewy Body Dementia. Although Estelle has been out of the public eye for several years because of her failing health, she will be greatly missed.

I am a self-proclaimed Golden Girls fanatic. There are those who might view this as a major character flaw. I believe it just shows that I have good taste in television. Yes, I do own all seven seasons of the series. No, I do not watch it everyday…anymore. There was a time when the ‘girls’ were just the medicine I needed for feeling blue. Now, their campy jokes just brighten my day and my knowledge of the show provides countless hours of sitcom trivia.

My favorite Sophia moment is from the episode where she and Dorothy dress up as “Sonny and Cher” for the mother/daughter beauty pageant. The two sing “I Got You Babe.” You’ve also got to love all of her “picture it…” moments–stories from Brooklyn or Sicily.

Here’s one of my favorite scenes…

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Posted in Current Events, TV, Video

Modeling with Pain

Posted on August 3, 2008 | 7 comments

By now you probably know that I am completely obsessed with America’s Next Top Model, starring one Miss Tyra Banks. Love it. Seriously. And, if somehow you’ve missed this sensation that has swept across the nation, please do the world a favor and click on the link in my first sentence to visit the website. Or, watch just one episode. They constantly replay them on MTV. You’ll be a better person for it. And I promise that you won’t be let down.

I think people sometimes don’t get my sarcasm. You really should know that I enjoy ANTM mostly for its comedic value. In general, that’s why I love most of reality TV so much. The funniest stuff is the stuff that you just can’t make up. Like when a reality “star” says something that is beyond outrageous and impossible to take out of context.

For instance, not too long ago, Kimberly from The Real World: Hollywood used the words “blackville” and “ghetto” in the same sentence to describe another cast member she didn’t like. It was all very typical, spoiled, white, Texan girl behavior. I saw the clip on one of those reality recap shows on E. I haven’t actually watched “The Real World” for about the last 10 seasons. I remember watching it when the title wasn’t ironic. At least in this season the cast members are honest about their intentions–they’re all trying to “make it” in various parts of the show biz industry. Maybe it’s gone back to gettin’ real. I may just add it to my DVR list for next season. 😉

I love it when I read in a reality show cast member’s bio that they’ve “moved to LA and are trying to make it in the industry.” Really? What part of getting drunk and allowing cameras tape you while you pee in a corner qualifies you to be an actor? But, then again, “actors” are even taking the “reality” show plunge these days. So, who am I to try and define what it means to be an actor?

Oh, fiddlesticks. I got off topic again. Crap. I hate when that happens. I was supposed to be talking about Tyra Banks and ANTM. This is what happens when I drink too much coffee and just let my fingers do the talking while I am actually people watching. Some days I get a little unfocused. At least, I’m not at home trying to do this while the TV is on–that’s always a disaster. Ok, so… Tyra.

Part-way through this past season, Tyra had the “models” do a little exercise with her. She taught the girls how to come up with poses when they couldn’t think of what to do. Evidently, this happens a lot in the modeling world. She starts out by walking the catwalk with them, showing off her fancy moves. Then she fakes a sprained ankle and segues into what she calls “Modeling with Pain.” Oh, Tyra! Now, there’s a real actress. She had all those models fooled, and we all know how difficult that is. I would love to post the clip of this, but, I think you should look it up for yourself. You’ve got to see the wealth of ANTM clips that are on YouTube. Search: “modeling with pain” or just “ANTM.” You’ll be amazed by what appears.

I was watching the show with Jeff, and we both just knew that we had to do this. It was too rich to pass up. We started calling out different types of pain for the other to pose. It was a pose-off. Jeff took it a step further and decided that we should have a few of our friends over and make a “game night” out of it. I’m proud to present the condensed version of the video we created from that night. This is what happens when you combine 5 gay men, a modeling “game”, a video camera, and several cosmos. We had so much fun doing this. I admit that I got a little bit bossy with my “modeling directions.” I blame it on the drinks…

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Posted in Gay, Humor, Pop-Culture, TV, Video

275 Smiles

Posted on June 3, 2008 | Leave a comment

Lately, I have been attempting to “green-up” my life by reading my newspapers online instead of buying them. I realized that I usually only skim through most of the paper anyway, so why buy it? And, I like to read different things from different papers. For instance, I like to read the Money section from USA Today. But, I like to get the world and national news from The New York Times. I get my local news from The San Francisco Chronicle. It just seemed ridiculous to buy three newspapers and read only part of each one, especially when I can get the exact same articles online. Plus, the newspaper sites update the news throughout the day and often have video to go along with the articles. So, there you have it.

Anyway, so I was reading the Times last week and came across an interesting article about Tyra Banks entitled Banksable. I’ve included the link to the video portion because I can’t get a copy of the video that is with it any other way. And, that’s the whole purpose of this post. Tyra says she has extensively studied and rehearsed the smile. And, better yet, her list of “perfected” smiles has evolved into a complete set of just 275. 275 smiles! OK, you all know by now that Tyra Banks has provided me with countless hours of enjoyment. I should send her a “thank you” JibJab (remember, I’m keeping it green.) Which reminds me, check out Jib-Jab. It’s much better than sending regular ecards. You can even put you and your friends faces in videos. Love it. Here’s the Christmas Video I sent out to some of my friends last Christmas:

Anyway, I’ve totally gone off-topic. Crap. Where was I? Oh yes, Tyra’s 275 smiles! 🙂 When you watch the video from The New York Times Magazine article, you’ll be happy to see that she has narrowed it down to just a few important smiles for us. And, I say “why?” Why not give us all 275 smiles, Tyra. Or, are you waiting to put them all in a book? This all got me thinking, “I, too, have several key smiles.” This is what led me to do another fabulous photo shoot for you. I doubt any of these are a part of Tyra’s 275. And, it brings me great pleasure to introduce you to Tyler’s 5 Key Smiles ®:

1) The “Mary Murphy” Smile (from So You Think You Can Dance)

2) The “3rd grade” Smile (This is what my school picture from 3rd grade looked like)

3) The “Oh You…” Smile (Oh you…stop it, you always say the funniest things. Also known as the “Renee Zellweger” Smile)

4) The “I Need a Bathroom” Smile (This look really says it all)

5) The “Old Geezer” Smile (This one really hurts to do–use with caution)

The white guy.

Posted on May 29, 2008 | 2 comments

I’m a white guy. More specifically, I’m of Scotch Irish descent, with just a scoop of German and Dutch. But, basically I’m a white guy. I know that even using the term ‘white guy’ will conjure up images of bad dancing and poor social skills–perhaps pocket protectors and thick eyeglasses. The term ‘vanilla’ may come to mind, too. Several dictionaries have described ‘vanilla’ as meaning regular, ordinary, with no special features. But, no matter what stereotype you throw at me, one fact remains: I am a white guy. My skin is so white, in fact, that I have occasionally been labeled ‘albino,’ or even called ‘powder’ (from the movie Powder; about an albino, of course). I’m not sure why people have found it necessary to point out my whiteness to me, as if I’ve never owned a mirror. But, today I am here to clear the air. I’m white, and I know it.

I burn really fast, too. It’s a problem, always having to avoid the sun. But, I’ve been this way all my life. As a child, I had white blond hair to go with my abnormally pale hue. My best friend growing up was a dark-haired Italian kid named Danny. He was as dark as I was light. More than one person made note of our ebony and ivory-like pairing. Many summer days we would spend an afternoon at the pool, only to come out darker (Danny) and redder (Moi), sort of like a strawberry and chocolate concoction.

In high school, I decided to take the universal advice I had received (and still do) from so many people: you just need more sun. Right, as if spending hours and hours in the sun without sunscreen would make me look like Danny–never mind the risk of skin cancer. But, nonetheless, I decided that’s exactly what I needed. So one very hot and very sunny day, Danny and I, with no sunscreen, went to a water park. This is when I discovered a very hard and necessary truth…

Sun + Tyler = >:-(

I had second-degree burns all over my back, shoulders, and chest. Despite having to sleep sitting up for a week, and blistering several times, when all was said and done, I was just as white as before. And, that was almost the last time I would try to tan.

I did have several other minor run-ins with a tanning bed and self-tanning lotion. But, for the most part, I realized I was going to have to be happy with the way I was. This didn’t mean, however, that people would leave me alone about my skin color. Just recently, I was sitting on the jump-seat with a co-worker who happened to be Mexican and very tan. He looked at me and then at himself and started laughing. Then he said, “Dude, you are so white.” Followed by, “Seriously, you need to get some sun.” Then, “Are you an albino?” He used just about every line I had ever heard in my life in the space of about two minutes.

Now, I’ve learned that the best way for me to deal this was just to ignore it and redirect the conversation. But, it wasn’t working. For two days he picked apart every part of my whiteness. And when he was done with my skin color, he decided to start dissecting why white people have no personality, no flavor… It was all way too much. This type of joking would have torn me apart in high school. I would have ended up in a corner rocking myself back and forth.* Luckily, it was just a two day trip. It would all end soon enough.

Later, I was talking to my friend Donna, who I was also working with, and decided to pull up my pant leg to show her just how white I was. And here is how Donna made my day: “Oh my God, boy, you have some serious calves. Can I touch them? I’ve wanted calves like that my whole life!” Of course, I immediately forgot how white my calves were and focused on their nice muscular shape. Then, I just simply hiked my pant leg up further to give her a better view. I replied, “…you like?”

——-
*On a side note, there was one topic that did distract him for a short while–gay sex–I’m not sure why, since he is a straight man, but that seemed to captivate his attention. Actually, I have found that many ‘straight’ guys are rather interested in various matters of gay life.
——-

Oh yeah, and here’s a little treat (or proof) for of all you who think white guys can’t dance…

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Posted in Flight Attendant, Food for Thought, Gay, Humor, Video