Category Archives: Food for Thought

Tree Hugger

Posted on September 11, 2008 | 2 comments

I love plants. Don’t forget, I have nine of them. Quick side note here–the baby of the family, Wendla, is blooming! God, they just grow up so fast. OK, so I love plants. Growing things is one of the few talents I developed while growing up on a farm. I also developed my talent for cursing, which I’ve previously blogged about. Even as a kid I loved to plant flowers and watch them grow and bloom. I also love to be in and around nature. Camping, to me, is the best form of relaxation.

So, I have to admit that I am part tree hugger. Not fully a tree hugger, just partially. And, actually just the part that likes trees. I am a firm believer in the use of deodorant, as well as taking regular showers. Basically, I just like to look at trees, not look like I live in the trees.

As you can imagine, I’ve been following the Berkeley tree climber saga. If you are not aware of the situation, here it is. Almost 2 years ago a group of “tree sitters” climbed up into a grove of Oak trees on the UC Berkeley campus when they announced they were going to be cut down to build a sports complex. Since that time they have literally lived in those trees. They’ve built a whole little community up in those trees, complete with pulleys and ropes to lower their feces down to the volunteers on the ground. Yes, I know, those ground volunteers are the real heroes.

All of this to save a few beautiful, old Oak trees. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m all for saving beautiful, old Oak trees. But there are certain ironies in this situation that I can’t ignore. For instance, these climbers obviously don’t have too big a problem with cutting down at least some trees. They are using wood platforms in their little Swiss Family Robinson style of community. Those boards look like they were purchased from Home Depot, so I doubt they went out into the forest and found a few fallen trees to cut up. Second, they are decimating those trees by living in them. I’m not opposed to a well-designed tree house–loved The Swiss Family Robinson! But, come on…really?

They have wasted so many of the resources of that community by trying to save a just a few trees. And, when it came time for them to be forced out of the last tree, they tried to make demands. They wanted to just walk away peacefully. OK, now that part is totally laughable. After costing the city of Berkeley and UC Berkeley millions of dollars, they wanted to just walk away. There must have been some serious weezing going on up in those trees.

So, I guess in conclusion I just wish these tree huggers would have better spent the money that was spent on keeping them up in those trees. I know that the millions spent on them by the city of Berkeley could have planted thousands of new little Oak trees.

2 Comments

Posted in Current Events, Food for Thought, Rants

A Sentimental Day

Posted on September 3, 2008 | 4 comments

My, My how times have changed over the last decade. I’ve been feeling extremely sentimental lately. It’s been 10 years since my mother passed, 10 years since I graduated from college, 10 years since I left the midwest, 10 years since my life took the dramatic turn that has led me to where I am today.

Frankly, in retrospect, I find it amazing that I am where I am. A secular gay man working in the airline industry and living in San Francisco. I still suffer from culture shock on occasion. Ten years ago I was just leaving the midwest after 6 years of Bible College. I was just starting an exciting job with an up-and-coming mega-church in Arizona. The job didn’t last long, and the next thing I knew I was working for my first airline. Then I started coming to terms with a life outside the Church. I realize that is a horrible summary of an extremely turbulent 1998. But, I don’t think I’m ready to broadcast all of that on my blog…nothing personal. Really, it’s me, not you.

The point of this post is not to elaborate on my journey from point A to point B. I’m just amazed at my starting point. I think that I’m mostly amazed that people change. More specifically, I changed. I mean, shit, I voted for Bob Dole in 1996. Ouch! Wow, that hurt to type those words. I. Voted. For. Bob. Dole. The only thing I have say in my defense is that I did not vote George W. Bush in 2000 or 2004. I remember sitting in my dormitory lobby gathered around the TV and feeling the immense dread of another 4 years with Bill Clinton. And now, I think that Bill Clinton was a great president! And that’s actually my point…I started thinking for myself.

I totally get why so many of my Bible College friends have a hard time understanding me these days. I’m not the same Tyler that they knew in college. There are parts of me that haven’t changed. I still love music, even some gospel music. I’m still just a little odd, a little geeky.

To be fair, it also freaks Jeff out a little bit to envision the Tyler from 1998. When I’m feeling a little bit ornery, I’ll whip into a rousing rendition of How Great Thou Art or Shout to the Lord. My friend Jaclyn likes to hear one my special prayers. You know the type that involves lots of thee’s and thou’s, blessing’s and tribulation’s. Oh yeah, I can preach, too. I reserve that for when I’m feeling just downright mean. And every time I pull from my personal experience in Bible College, I also have a moment of gratitude. I’m happy to be where I am now.

For old time’s sake, here’s a picture of me from my Bible-thumpin’ days. This was taken at my senior piano recital. I had no idea that my whole world was about to change…

4 Comments

Posted in Food for Thought, Gay, My Life, Pictures, The College Years

Christians

Posted on August 28, 2008 | 6 comments

I’m really going to go out on a limb here. Not one of those thick, sturdy limbs that can handle all of my 190 pounds, OK, fine “200” pounds…whatever. Jeez. Let’s not get nitpicky. This post is going to place me in a not-so-comfortable position. But I’m ready. I think.

Not all Christians are bad. OK, so the uncomfortable part is that I have a very diverse readership (Can you call 30 readers a “readership?”), and a good portion of them are Christians. And, they probably don’t appreciate the backhanded compliment. But, to those readers, the ones for whom I am always trying to soften my anti-religious sentiments, I apologize. I do like you. Most of you, anyway.

It’s been a rough road, leaving the Church. For those of you who are not Christians or religious, try to imagine removing a crucial part of your life–albeit one you’re ready to remove–and the void that remains. For me it was like removing a malignant tumor. It had to be removed in order for me to be healthy, but it created a huge empty space. And the surgery left a prominent scar that easily can be noticed when you talk to me. I work hard at applying a good cover-up. But, at least I can say that the wound is healing nicely.

Since I have left, I have tended to turn Christians into villains. These days I view myself as being pretty far to the left. So, it doesn’t take too much work to find a reason to dislike someone on the opposite side of the fence. Before the age of the internet (i.e. – Facebook, MySpace, Blogging) I would probably never have reconnected with any old Christian friends. I mean, I live in San Francisco and could pretty much segregate myself for the rest of my life here. But, that would be stupid. In order to truly move on in a healthy way, I have to work through it.

So, as a result, 42% of my Facebook friends are from my Bible College days. I’ve spent a lot of time rehashing the last 10 years with them. And, I have to say that I’ve been surprised by the response from most of my old friends. With a few exceptions, my old friends have been supportive. It hasn’t been all accusatory and hateful like I expected.

What got me thinking about all this was Don Miller. Up until 3 days ago, I had never heard of him. He gave the closing prayer at the Democratic National Convention on the first night. I pretty much blew him off. Then, my fellow blogger and twitterer Amy Storms (who may never talk to me again after this post), made note of him and I decided to check him out. He’s a Christian author who is supporting Barack Obama. I know that this really doesn’t tell you who he is, but I included a link on his name so you can check him out if you want. My point is–and it has only taken me six paragraphs to get to it–he represents a pleasantly unusual group of Christians that are going to vote for Barack Obama.

It really is more than that, though. I listened to several of his interviews online and found him to be extremely refreshing. He wants to be treated with respect, so he is treating us with respect. I’m not saying that we will see him marching down the street with a rainbow flag anytime soon, but this is one Christian that actually looks at the gay marriage debate through constitutional eyes, not religious eyes. And, the same with abortion. He calls any abortion a tragic decision, and wants to stop needless abortions, but, does not want to take away a woman’s right to choose. Granted, this last item is a summary of what I gathered online, so I hope I’m not overstating it.

So, finally, in conclusion, and I know you are ready for the “conclusion,” I’ve noticed this from other Christian friends. They are great people. I may not agree with their religious and spiritual belief systems, but, that does not mean that we can’t be friends and respect each other. There is more to a person than just their religious and spiritual beliefs. And it would be a shame to shut someone out solely based on those differences. So, since I can’t stand to be lumped into a stereotypical group of gay left-wing liberals (which I am), I’m going to be open minded about Christians. And, to those who continue to insult me because of my beliefs and my sexual orientation, for now I am going to turn the other cheek. Because, quoting Don Miller, “It’s the only way.” We will never be unified otherwise.

6 Comments

Posted in Current Events, Food for Thought, Politics

Good Vibes

Posted on August 4, 2008 | 3 comments

Today was totally a lesson in sending out good vibes. I worked with my all-time favorite captain. Her name is Jan, and she is absolutely wonderful. I want to be her when I grow up. She’s one of those obsessively optimistic and upbeat people that just seem to find the best in every person. When you talk to her you just can’t help but smile. It’s infectious. Yes, at first, she can be overwhelming. But, after awhile you see that it’s coming from a totally honest place. She really does want to brighten your day.

On the other end of the spectrum, I was also working with a flight attendant who had the complete opposite energy/vibe–totally icy and a mute, really. It made for a very interesting day. And it made me think, who am I or how am I? Do I make people wanna smile? Or, do I make people wanna avoid me? Do I brighten people’s day? Or, do I drag them down?




Hmm. That’s a tough one. Maybe I’m bipolar, but, I can easily go both ways. Some days I’m way up and some days I’m way down. I wish I had the persistent upbeat-ness of Captain Jan. I’m afraid, though, that I don’t. It doesn’t always come natural for me to be friendly and smile. I guess that’s why I created my mantra which I haven’t talked about for awhile, but still recite almost daily. Be kind, be generous, be honest…be kind, be generous, be honest. I don’t want to walk around with a scowl on my face so I also tell myself to “soften” my expression as I’m heading down the street.

It’s amazing to me that when you place a smile or at least a pleasant expression onto your face, it works itself inward. Some days I’m all bent out of shape over life and have to really force that damn smile onto my face. But, if I persist…eventually I feel better inside. I know that I’m sounding all warm and fuzzy today, but it’s true. Those who smile a lot and laugh a lot feel better on the inside. And I’m all for feeling better on the inside. It’s a slippery slope that leads downward toward being a total grump. You have to fight it–unless, of course you have a chronically happy disposition like Captain Jan.


So, that’s just a thought for today. Sometimes being happy takes work. You’ve gotta laugh and you’ve gotta smile. Don’t make me come over there and beat that smile outta ya. I will… and I ain’t frontin’.

3 Comments

Posted in Flight Attendant, Food for Thought, Pictures

30 days

Posted on July 28, 2008 | 1 comment

One of my favorite shows on TV is Morgan Spurlock’s 30 Days. It’s just one of a few “serious” shows that I’m watching this summer. My TV diet right now is heavy on ridiculous reality shows, which I do enjoy. It’s nice to balance the fluff, however, with some substance. 30 Days does that for me.

The basic premise of the show is to take someone and place them in a particular environment that is unfamiliar to them for 30 days. Some of the episodes just involve Morgan working in a coal mine for 30 days or Morgan living in a prison for 30 days, that type of thing. The really good ones place people outside their comfort zones. For instance, they had a Mormon mother move in with two gay dads who had adopted several children. Another one of my favorites involved Morgan and his wife moving to a different city and having to live on minimum wage for 30 days.

One of the most powerful episodes I watched was about animal rights. They had a guy from North Carolina who was a hunter move in with a family of vegans who worked with PETA. He had to work in an animal rehabilitation center, spend time with the PETA family, and actually participate in several PETA events. I don’t necessarily agree with everything that PETA supports or the way that they tend to protest. But, I do have to admit that the useless mistreatment and killing of animals needs to stop. It was amazing to see the hunter open himself up to another way of thinking.

I guess the thing I most like about the show is that it follows people while they explore different ways of life beyond their own. Not all of the people on the show make changes or expand their worldviews. For instance, the gay dads and the Mormon mama’s parting of ways was barely cordial. They spent most of their month in disagreement. It was extremely uncomfortable. I may be biased, but Mormon Mama just looked like an idiot. The gay dads always could defend why they believed what they believed. Mrs. Mormon’s best defense for her beliefs about gays was “this is the core of what I believe. And, I’ve always believed it. I just know that it’s true. I can feel it.” Not exactly a foolproof argument.

If you’re going to go on a show that places you right in the middle of something that you disagree with, you probably should be able to at least defend your beliefs. She just kept on complaining that everyone was ganging up on her. Someone seriously needed to remind her that she chose to go into a home with two gay dads. And if you’re gonna tell them to their face (in their own home) that they are going to hell and leading their children down that same path, you’d better have a stronger argument than “this is just what I feel to be true.” I can respect someone who has different beliefs if they can at least give a good reason why they believe it. Or, at least have the guts to say “I don’t know, but I’m trying to figure it out.”

Oh crap. Damn. There I go a-preachin’ again. The show makes me think and gets me riled up at the same time. Well, this has become a longer post than I’d originally intended. I just wanted to share my thoughts about 30 days. Check it out, the first season is already on DVD.

1 Comment

Posted in Food for Thought, Pop-Culture, Rants, TV